All Things Purple

By smname and bluesprinkles on February 14, 2004

Grapes. Purple, sweet, round.

"FREE THE FRUIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" read the placard on the corner of Grape and Vine. Mauricious Van Dangle stared at the sign longingly. He pondered life and death and whether he should buy some. Entering the store, he began to sample a Swedish grape.

"HOLY MOTHER!" he cried, while shoving 500,000 more into his piehole. "THESE SWEDISH GRAPES ARE SO SOUR!!!!!!!!!!!! IT'S BURNING MY LARGE INTESTINE OFF!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" Mauricious exploded.

The next day, the sign read: "WARNING: THE SWEDISH GRAPES MAY MURDER! PLEASE USE CAUTION." Suddenly, a detective raced into the store and ate all things purple.

He exploded.